


The Delicate Beauty

by kyoselflove



Category: Jrock, the GazettE
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Car Accidents, Character Death, M/M, Medical Conditions, Terminal Illnesses, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-07
Updated: 2015-07-07
Packaged: 2018-04-08 02:39:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4287621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyoselflove/pseuds/kyoselflove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This one time Reita broke the code and saved a life, one that didn't want to be saved.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Delicate Beauty

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for mistakes.

In his line of work he had both good days and bad ones. Though they were more often good, he had a feeling today wasn’t one of them. It always happens when he’s on lunch break. Both him and his partner and best friend, Uruha, were enjoying a nice hot meal when their quiet walky-talkies croaked with static and then a voice. A horrifying accident had occurred not to far away from where they sat.

With heavy eyes, Uruha nodded and he followed him out to their emergency vehicle. 

Reita had always thought of himself as a good, caring guy, maybe even a very valuable member of society. It was days like these that he was reminded that in fact life was fragile, and in any instant it could be taken away just like that. One of the reasons he had become a paramedic. He always thought if he were there, he could fix everything up. But obviously he wasn’t delusional and knew some times there was just nothing he could do.

Judging by how there were only two cars in the accident, Reita hoped it wouldn’t be gruesome enough to threaten his lunch to come back up. But in his gut, he could feel that he wouldn’t be so lucky.

He let Uruha take the wheel as he brooded in the passenger seat; both of them were quiet, neither liking to discuss what they might find. As they pulled up to the scene, the cars both had a substantial amount of damage, but one was completely totaled, the entire front end somehow crushed all the way into the cabin. Reita’s high hopes for survivors were plummeting by the second.

Grabbing his med kit, Reita rushed out towards the totaled vehicle while Uruha went to the other. He met with a seasonal firefighter, Aoi, who upon seeing him, offered no greeting, straight to business, “We removed the door, they’re getting him out now, my guess is…it’s not looking good. He hasn’t been responsive.” Aoi hadn’t needed to tell him anything, he could tell by the look in his eyes.

Reita moved over to where the other men were lying down the victim on a stretcher. Kneeling beside him, he put on his gloves; Reita guessed the young man was not even twenty-one. It made him all the more determined to save his life. He started to remove everything he needed from his medical pack, “Any others?” 

Aoi shook his head, “Only one other, the driver, and she was dead on arrival.”

Placing his finger in the victim’s mouth, Reita checked to see if his airway was clear, then proceeded to give him oxygen. With his head on the young man’s chest, he sighed. “He’s not breathing.” Reita immediately went to tear off the shirt the victim was wearing so he could perform CPR. 

After he did so he halted his movements and stared at the inked flesh. Uruha was there now; he caught his friend coming near in his peripheral vision. He ignored the tattoo and began pumping his chest. A hand squeezed his arm; it was Uruha, his voice frantic, “What do you think you’re doing?”

“What does it look like? Saving his life!”

“For fuck’s sake Reita! He has ‘do not resuscitate’ tattooed on his chest! He doesn’t want to be saved!” Again, Uruha tried to stop him in which Reita shoved his friend away.

“I don’t give a fuck what it says!” Reita screamed, and continued to try to get the young man breathing again. He stopped his brutal pushes on that fragile chest when he saw the victim open his mouth and a breath made its way out.

Reita slumped on the paved ground in relief, catching the glare that Uruha sent him. “You went to far today, Retia.”

Uruha helped him put the victim in the ambulance, he chose to disregard his friend’s disapproval, “What about the other car?”

“Minor scrapes and bruises.” 

“That’s good…” Retia said, his eyes never leaving the pale face before him, he stayed in the back while Uruha drove again. He was determined to keep his patient stable. And through all the chaos, Reita hadn’t even realized how beautiful the young man truly was; breathtaking would be a better word to describe him. Reita could feel his heart swelling, why wouldn’t he want to be saved?

 

*

 

Upon entering the office, Reita had already prepared himself for not-so-good news. Then seeing Kai’s angry face, which was a very rare occurrence, he visibly winced. “Do you want to tell me why you felt the need to disobey a patient’s legal right?”

“I mean come on he’s a kid. He could have just gotten the tattoo thinking it was cool, or something.” 

A stack of papers were slammed in front of him, he vaguely looked at them, only to register the name in his mind, “Here’s the paperwork that clearly states that he is a candidate for DNR.” Kai sighed, done pacing he finally sat down at his desk, “I don’t want to do this Retia, but I have to. You are on probation leave until further notice.”

Reita stood up, acknowledging his fate, biting back the smart remark of getting punished for saving a life, “Fine.”

“Reita, I’m sorry.”

He nodded, but before leaving the office, he made the immature choice of slamming Kai’s door closed. Casting away the worried glance that Uruha gave him in the common room.

 

*

 

He couldn’t really say what had compelled him to visit the patient in the hospital, maybe he was curious, or maybe he just wanted to see that gorgeous face once again, full of life.

It was easy enough; Reita made his way through the halls, and ended up in front of his room. He frowned when he realized this was in the more permanent side of the hospital, the wing where everyone here was waiting to die. 

Entering the room, he saw him, Matsumoto Takanori. Lazily resting against his bed of pillows, flipping through channels on the television with a scowl. His face flushed more than before, yet still lacking the living glow. The grimace only became bigger as his dark eyes landed on Reita. “Who the fuck are you?”

“I’m the reason you’re still here.” Not the best approach, but Reita wanted to start off being honest. Not that anything would come of any of this.

“Oh, so you’re the asshole who can’t read,” Takanori laughed, not genuinely and it only showed clearer when he glared, “thanks a lot, by the way.”

“I—“

“Save it,” Takanori went back to looking mildly interested on what was on the TV, “I don’t need your damn sympathy or apology.” 

This time he was allowed to speak, “I just wanted to make sure you were okay…”

Takanori scoffed, “Oh gee, thanks. No I’m far from okay, asshole. My mother is dead, I’m dying, even though I was dead and had that luxury of staying dead, nope. You had to go and fuck that up, didn’t you?”

Reita was speechless; he had never meant someone so determined to die.

“Get the fuck out already!”

And Retia left. But he wouldn’t be giving up that easily on Takanori.

 

*

 

Once a week, Reita came to visit Takanori, who had informed him that he would rather be called Ruki instead. After Ruki had realized that Reita wasn’t going to stop coming—even though he could tell personnel to kick him out and prevent him from ever coming again—Ruki didn’t bother with it anymore.

Reita thought flowers were a bit lame, so he decided that he would bring a delicious treat every time he came to visit. But that also came to an end, when he noticed that Ruki couldn’t even keep down food anymore. Each time, Ruki looked more and more closer to death. And it scared Reita, still he had no idea what was wrong with Ruki but it was obviously terminal and a losing battle.

“What the fuck is that?”

“This is,” Reita took a seat by Ruki’s bed, placing the box on the make shift table tray, “a present for you.”

“Oh,” Peering at it curiously, Ruki smirked, “it better not be mochi again.”

“Nope, still trying to get your puke stains out of my shoes.” It hurt for him to say, but once he saw Ruki’s smile followed by an honest laugh, it made it worth it.

“Not sorry about that, since it is your fault after all,” Ruki tore away the wrapping paper, his smile falling into a frown, “chess? Really?”

“Something for us to do with all this free time.”

“Who the hell likes chess though?”

“Would you rather have flowers then?”

“That seems normal enough.”

“Okay, next time I’ll bring an orchid.” 

“Why orchid?” 

“Because they mean delicate beauty.” Reita wished he could take it back, their joking atmosphere threatened by his admission. 

Ruki scoffed and looked away, “fine then, get me some damn orchids. And why do you know so much about flowers?”

“I-I don’t…” 

“Uh huh, not buying it,” letting out a dramatic sigh, Ruki opened the chess box, “alright let us play this stupid game.” Even if Ruki stated that his gift choice was horrid, the smile tugging at his lips said otherwise.

 

*

 

Staring at the ceiling at home was what he had resorted to, when he wasn’t spending his free days with Ruki, that was all he did. Lying in a blanket of melancholy, he began to reprocess his life over and over again. 

How one day, one patient, had changed it all.

When he wasn’t around Ruki, he was overcome with the burden of what was actually happening, that one day, there would be no friendly visits. And Reita didn’t know how to handle that. He had never let anyone else get so personal to him. 

And even Uruha was beginning to worry.

Tonight, they had planned to get together for a few drinks (actually Uruha invited himself over). After downing a few shots, Reita only began to feel worse.

“Okay, you need to fess up. What’s your deal lately? Is your leave really bothering you that much?”

“You remember the one I saved…?” The effects of alcohol definitely were gripping his mind tightly as he struggled to even explain what was going on in there.

“How could I forget?”

“Well, I’ve been visiting him,” he held up a finger to shush Uruha as he saw the look of disapproval, a look Uruha wore all to well, “turns out, he signed up for DNR because he’s going through a slow and painful death.” 

Reita let out a dry laugh. Often he thought of the possibility of helping Ruki…to pass on. Even though it was highly illegal and not only that, Reita knew he wouldn’t be able to go through with it anyhow.

“What has gotten into you, Rei?”

He shook his head and rubbed his face with his hand, he had no idea how to answer that question, ”I don’t know.”

“You just ended up at his hospital room one day?”

“No,” how could he tell his best friend for all his life that he was steadily and surely falling in love with a dying man that was ten years younger than him. 

The night ended in him becoming sober, Uruha even more worried and nothing resolved.

 

*

 

The weekly visits had turned into daily ones, and neither of them was complaining. Reita had noticed that Ruki had lost a lot of weight; he tried to put off the observation and continue to enjoy their time together.

“I still don’t get why you come here, I’m obviously horrible company.” Ruki flung his wrist in the air in a theatrical twist.

“No you’re not. And I think you know why.” Because Reita was still to afraid to say it himself.

“Yeah, I do.” Ruki gave him a weak smile, that Reita unable to resist bringing a hand to that beautifully yet unnatural pale face, and let his fingers stroke along the soft skin. He held his breath when Ruki took ahold of his hand and brushed his lips along the back of his hand. “You’re a crazy bastard.”

Reita turned up the side of his lips; “I should be saying that to you.”

They found themselves in a contented silence, Reita on the slim hospital bed, holding on to Ruki dearly. Each breath that Ruki took was strained; as time passed they were becoming more and more less frequent. A tear slipped down his cheek as Retia waited for the inevitable.

“You know…” Ruki’s voice sounded tired, the shield that Reita had put around his heart cracking at every word, “I’m glad that you’re such a dumbass,” a deep breath, “and can’t follow instructions.” 

The unwanted bubble of laughter escaped him as he let the tears flow freely now, “I’m also glad.” Pulling Ruki closer to his chest, he squeezed him gently and placed a chaste kiss on the nape of his neck.

It clearly was difficult for Ruki to talk, so again they let the silence envelop around them, only the soft beeps from the machines could be heard.

When the beeps turned into one long sound, Reita toned it out, holding Ruki closer and closing his eyes.


End file.
